This most certainly feels like looking for your old scars and wedging in it the exact same wounds that did you in years ago. It’s like wanting to just escape to a distant universe where you’re sure not to feel them anymore. It most certainly feels like the painstaking catharsis you had to endure for the years that came after were for naught, when the slightest screams and whines trigger a physical and emotional response that you’ve buried deep. Now you don’t know how to deal with it again, and you’re angry and tired because you don’t deserve this. And no one does. And you don’t wish this on anyone at all.
When people like them make things extremely miserable for the rest, you leave them. You leave them and you never look back. You have no mercy for them, because their misery is their choice, and theirs alone. Never mind that they feel like they’ve been robbed of their children, never mind that they feel like alcohol is the only recourse left for honesty, never mind that they try so hard to grip but slip because they’re too intoxicated to even compose themselves.
You know what you want, and after seven years of trying to grow up, you’re right back where you started.